My Sensei

Is a comic genius…although I’m not quite sure to what extent he realises this ‘special’ quality…

Since I had gotten my sensei to sign my release papers [yes I need to inform the university when I leave the country. There’s a permission form which has to be signed by your professor one for when you leave and another for when you come back…glorious isn’t it?! But this has stemmed from previous students having disappeared back to their home country, without so much as a word to anyone, and never returning. So now the university likes to keep all it’s people on a tight little leash.] he had been telling me useful titbits of information about Thailand every time he passed me in the corridor or saw me in the lab. His first question was if I spoke Thai…obviously my answer was no. Their language is tonal and not just that they have more dammed tones than the Chinese do. Which makes things a little difficult, so I have no chance. Not with my complete lack of knack with languages. I was planning to just get by on doing the traditional British thing of going around speaking English to people LOUDER AND SSSLLLOOOOOooooOOOooWWWWwwweer. Because that *really* helps with the situation, making all words unrecognisable to any sentient being. Anyway, he was giving me advice on haggling and tried to teach me how to say ‘expensive’ in Thai…unfortunately, like most things, it went in one ear and straight out the other.

When I got back from Thailand last week my sensei was doing his usual little rounds of our little lab, checking that there were in fact students doing things that they were meant to be…like studying, he popped over to my desk to throw some ideas about my experiments about and generally check that I was ok…He even remembered I went to Thailand and was asking how it was and then went on a little random ramble by suddenly stating:

‘Ah! Japan dangerous to British girls…ne?!’

and I was like, ‘yeah, I guess’

Sensei: ‘British girl killed 4 years ago by crazy Japanese man also’
Me: ‘yes, I remember that…it was in the news a lot....
Sensei: [makes some sucking-in air sounds of general disapproval] ‘now another crazy Japanese man kill British girl…parents rich…they look after too much’ [more sucking-in air sounds]
Me: ‘…the parents spoilt him?’
Sensei: ‘yes, yes, yes…he had no job...’ [mutters in the general direction of more disapproval]….suggesting that this was one of the deciding factors in the murder…but obviously, the root cause was the rich, overly-nice upbringing.